


When All is Said and Done

by HopeForCastiel



Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: Angst, DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, F/M, Fandom, Love Story, M/M, Romance, Twist and Shout
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-10
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-15 03:27:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1289485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopeForCastiel/pseuds/HopeForCastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester, two young men, have been in a serious relationship for three years by now. They are as happy as can be, and are contented with each other's company. But when life takes a sudden unwelcome turn, they both have to confront their mortality.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Year

Dean didn't want to be at the New Years eve party. He had better things to do at home. He frowned moodily as he was dragged through the crowded room by Jo, who seemed to be enjoying herself thoroughly. She was already tipsy, and she held her drink loosely in one hand as she weaved between the dancers. He allowed her to drag him by the sleeve of his plaid shirt, not wanting to lose her in the crowd just yet.

"C'mon Dean, have some fun!" She laughed, imitating his grumpy face. He wrinkled his nose, unwilling to have fun without his boyfriend. He sighed again.

"So when did you say Cas would get here?" He asked, checking his watch for the fourth time since they had arrived. Jo shrugged, eyebrows raised. He just wanted to see his boyfriend, that was all.

"After the doctors appointment. Can you believe that they put him in this late? It's already gone eight." Jo replied, holding his hand. "Your boyfriend'll be fine. Quit worrying, alright?" Dean shrugged his broad shoulders, a small smile on his face.

"I can't help it. Now... Can we just sit somewhere quite until he gets here?" He scrunched up his freckled face as he was elbowed by a dancing couple. The place was loud, and smelled of alcohol and sweat.

"Spoilsport. Fine." Jo rolled her eyes and led him to a quiet spot by the window. The window was open and a cold breeze drifted into the room. It was too hot, filled with the combined body heat of the forty-odd partygoers. She leaned on the windowsill and watched the party with a smirk on her face. Her blonde hair was tousled from dancing. "

You can go and have fun you know, you don't need to babysit me." Dean said, looking up at her from where he was sat, sprawled on the sofa. His arms were loosely tucked into each other, with his cheekbones resting on his closed hand.

"If you say so, Mr Grumpy." Jo stuck out her tongue playfully and disappeared into the crowd. Dean sighed and closed his eyes, knowing he might be in for a long weight before Castiel turned up at the party. The music was pretty loud, with a heavy bass tone. Some hipster band nobody but the party planner had heard of. It didn't stop the crowd from dancing to it though. 

"Hey, Dean!" Deans head shot up from where it had been resting on his knuckles. He broke into a grin as he recognised the voice as that of Castiel. His eyes brightened at the sight of his boyfriend, who was dressed in a simple dark t-shirt and jeans. Dean stood, stepping forwards a little to lean into his boyfriends shoulder.

"Hi Cas, what took you so long?" He asked as he interlaced his fingers with his boyfriends. Castiel shrugged, tightening his grip on Deans hand. Castiel exhaled, seeming tired.

"Traffic." Castiel said vaguely, looking around. His voice was quiet and low and slightly gravelly as usual, but also carried a shy undertone that wasn't usually present. His bluer-than-blue eyes were hooded and he seemed distant.

"What's up?" Dean frowned again, tilting his head. He had picked up a few of his boyfriends mannerisms over the months they had been together.

"Eh, nothing. Shall we ditch this place?" Castiel suggested, smiling lopsidedly. He seemed to have recognised something in Deans face that reminded him of himself.

"Hell yeah," Dean said eagerly, "Jo's busy on the dance floor. She won't miss us at all if we leave early." He squeezed Castiels hand and let him lead him outside. The cold air hit them like a fist and Dean leaned into Cas' shoulder as they walked along the pavement to Deans old car.

"I love you..." Dean murmured as they climbed in. "You seem off. What's the matter?" He asked, starting the engine with a deft turn of the key. The old car rumbled to life.

"Nothing." Castiel mumbled. "I'm just tired." His chin rested on his chest as he sunk down in his seat, leaning on Deans shoulder as he drove through the darkened streets. The journey was quiet enough, with party-goers and nightclub crawlers filling the streets. Dancers spilled out into the night air as they waited to enter the next club on their list.

After a long, drawn out pause, Dean spoke again. "Cas, I know you well enough to know when something's up." Dean said wryly, turning his head to watch the yellow streetlights pass over Cas' face as he slumped in the passenger seat.

"I said I was fine. Give it a rest, Dean." Castiel murmured, turning to look out the window with his knees drawn up to his chest like a nesting owl. His hair was ruffled and spiked up messily, making him look more dishevelled that a normal person. That was one of the reasons why Dean loved him. The dashboard clock ticked past Nine o'clock just as they pulled up to the pint-sized apartment they shared. The door creaked open and Dean smiled as Cas leaned on his shoulder. They closed the door behind them and switched on the bare minimum of lights around the place before settling down on the sofa with an opened bottle of red wine. Dean lay on his back on the couch with Cas' feet entwined with his own, the smaller young mans head resting on his chest. 

They watched bad comedy shows together, with Dean tangling his hand in Cas' long curly hair. Dean sighed happily, feeling Castiels' warm breath on his forearm whenever he laughed at the gags on TV. "I love you so much, Cas..." He murmured, angling his head to kiss Cas' nose. Castiel blew air out of his nose, and kissed Dean back on the lips. 

"You have a lot of freckles..." Castiel commented quietly, kissing each one. "They say each one is the mark of an angels kiss." He traced his hand down Deans cheek, smiling like a fool. 

"Well I've been having some heavy makeouts with somebody then..." Dean replied, eyes shining as he took a sip of wine. Castiel rolled onto his side, nestling down between Dean and the back of the sofa. He tangled his legs with Deans and kissed the back of his neck gently, only stopping to snort at a joke from the tv. "Hey, Cas..." Dean turned his head from the tv and shuffled his body so they were facing each other, lying down on the threadbare sofa with Castiels broad back to the sofas back. "Are you sure you're ok?" 

Castiel rolled his eyes, face creasing into a frown. "Dean, I'm fine." He replied, gravelly voice sounding slightly irritated. He kissed Dean once more. "Can you pass me more wine?" Cas sipped the wine happily, resting his head on Deans arm to watch the tv. 

"Three... Two... One... Happy 2014, Dean" He placed a lingering kiss on Deans heart-shaped lips.

"Happy New Year, baby." 


	2. Diagnosis

**Chapter Two**

 

Dean woke with a small jump, hands clasped together over his firm chest. "Cas…?" He mumbled, missing the young mans warmth against his own. He rolled off the sofa, twisting his head to relief the crick in his neck. He rubbed the nape of his neck sleepily, before getting to his feet. At some point during the night, or early hours of the morning, his shirt had come off. Maybe Cas had had something to do with that. He rubbed his eyes, blinking them to clear them of sleep.

"I'm in the kitchen, babe." Castiel called through, the aroma of cooking pancakes spreading through the tiny apartment. He was wearing old boxers, and nothing else. He smiled happily as he flipped a pancake, multitasking his way through the morning. "I have to talk to you sometime." He murmured to himself, eyes fixed on his boyfriend like he was trying to memorise his features. He rolled his wide shoulders, adding butter to the pan and watching the batter sizzle as it hit the hot surface.

"Whats up?" Dean asked, sliding onto the kitchen sideboard with a grin. "Those are looking good, Cas." He twitched his feet restlessly, an echo of a childhood habit, perhaps. He slid off the sideboard with a jerk of his legs, and swooped up behind Cas to clasp his arms around the young mans waist. He leaned his head into the crook of Castiels neck and breathed in his scent, which mingled with the scent of the sizzling stack of pancakes on the table. He kissed Castiels neck, snuggling like a little puppy. 

"I have something to tell you… But it can wait until the pancakes are done." Cas replied, kissing his boyfriend sweetly. He finished up the final pancake and served it onto a fresh plate with a flourish of his hand. "I hope you're hungry baby, I've cooked a little too much." He slid the plate over to his boyfriend and grinned as he took it. 

"Pancakes are as good cold as they are hot, you know." Dean said as he topped his with golden syrup. "Anyway… You wanted to tell me something…?" Dean shovelled pancakes into his mouth at an alarming rate. "Is it something to do with last night?" He tilted his head, smiling disarmingly. 

Castiel sat next to him, shifting awkwardly. "I…" He coughed. "I have lung cancer." He squeaked, speaking too fast as to get the sentence out as fast as he could. He stared at the floor, blushing awkwardly. He wanted to sink into the floor... He hadn't wanted to tell Dean until he had gotten his own head around it, so he had kept silent. But Dean was more observant than he had realised and could easily see something was up with him. Coming clean was a weight off his chest.

Dean stopped eating immediately, fork slowly lowering to his plate. All the background noise seemed to filter away as he struggled to get his head around the fact. "How… Are you gonna be ok?" He asked, reaching forward to grasp his hand quickly, eyes wide. He held on a little too tightly. But in the way a drowning man holds on a little too tightly to a life-raft. He blinked, his eyes watering. He was already imagining the worst. Living without Cas… Having to get up, go through the motions, but not actually have anything to get up for.

"The Doctor says its treatable. I have a pretty good chance of making it if chemo starts soon. They say it can start in a months time." Cas spoke in short sentences, just relaying what the doctor had told him last night. "They say its rare for a person my age to have it… It has gotten pretty far along. Stage three, I think. Radiotherapy isn't an option." He winced. "Dean, you're crushing my hand." Dean relinquished his grasp, only to begin to wring his own hands.

"What happens now? What do we do for this month?" Dean asked, head spinning. "What do I do?" He leaned back on his chair, heart pounding. What  _could_ he do? He could hear the blood rushing in his ears. If he had been standing up, he probably would have toppled over.

"Dean, you're panicing." Castiel said, putting his hand soothingly on Deans leg. "I'll be fine. I'm young. My life expectancy is good." He chuckled, and for the first time Dean noticed the slight wheeziness to his laugh. "I'll be ok. Ok?" He blinked, his bright blue eyes looking reassuringly into Deans apple-green ones.

"Ok, so… Alright…" Dean tried to take deeper breaths, not wanting to keel over and have a heart attack just yet. "So… What now?" He repeated his question, foot twitching again. He stood up, pacing from side to side, the pancakes forgotten on the table.

"Well… We could go on a holiday. You could take time off work and we could just… Drive." Castiel answered, hands awkwardly placed on his lap now. "Chemo doesn't start for another month or so, thats plenty of time." He smiled. 

"So... A roadtrip?" Dean prompted Castiel to continue. "I could take some time off but it would be tricky, cos my boss is a butthole." He shrugged, seemingly calm despite the news. He ran his hands through his hair, a mechanism he had developed to cope with stress. "But if I play it right I could get some time off."

"Good... We can leave whenever. I'm on sick leave for as long as I need, apparently." Castiel chuckled, standing up. Dean went to stand with him, not wanting to leave him alone any more than he had to. "Finish your pancakes. I need a shower, alright?" He trailed his hand across Deans shoulder reassuringly before leaving the room.

As Castiel vanished from the room, Dean finished his pancakes slowly. He grabbed his laptop and began to research Stage 3 Lung Cancer. Breathlessness... Lethargy... Coughing blood? How had he not noticed this? And how rare it was for someone like Castiel to get. What were the chances? One in a million, for sure. "Oh, Cas..." He murmured to himself, feeling his heart begin to break. His throat closed up a little like he had swallowed a fist-sized rock. Maybe a holiday was just what they needed.


	3. The Hill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas begin to come to terms with everything.

Chapter Three

 

Castiel seemed sluggish as he got out of bed the next morning. Tangled up in Deans firm embrace had kept him from being cold, and he had woken up to Dean shifting position. Dean was a notorious blanket-stealer, but Castiel never complained because he also ran pretty hot. He smiled softly, kissing Deans nose sweetly. "Up and at em, princess." He mumbled, pressing his forehead to Deans. His hair was messy, it's light brown locks flattened and spiked up at random angles. It was at times like these that Cas loved him most.

Dean stretched his arms out, smiling dopily. His smile crinkled the corners of his eyes, and as he rolled across the bed onto the carpet they seemed to sparkle. He was wearing his usual attire of boxers, but dressed in dark jeans and a white t-shirt. Cas lay in bed, watching him with his head leaned back on his hands.

Dean stuck his favourite CD on the player, and "Ho Hey" began to play. Castiel smiled and rolled onto his feet. "You've really taken to the Lumineers, haven't you?" Cas chuckled as they danced along to it. His hand dropped to Deans hip and they slow-waltzed around the bed together.

"Shut up." Dean said, cutting off any retort Cas may have had with a kiss. They spun slowly to the folksy beat.

"I belong with you, you belong with me, in my sweet heart..." Cas broke away the kiss to sing the chorus with a grin. He threw his head back to sing, as was his habit, and Dean laughed. He looked like a howling wolf. He wasn't the best singer, and he sang with the voice of a man who had just woken up, but he meant what he sang. That was what mattered. Dean was a better singer. He loved to play the guitar. As the song drew to a close, he smiled, a tinge of sadness in his eyes.

"Put some clothes on. I've got some stuff to tell you." He said, releasing Castiels hands from where they had been grasped by his own.

"Never told me to put more clothes on before." Cas said teasingly, pulling on a pair of jeans and one of Deans favourite plaid shirts. He must've had hundreds of the things. They looked good on him, so Cas didn't complain.

"Well, I called Sam last night, and he said that he could drive down and visit before we hit the road. Just a few days, but you could meet the baby. Jess is really excited to meet you, apparently." Dean said excitedly, eyes bright. He didn't meet up with his brother as much as he should, but Sam had been so busy with his wife and baby that there hadn't been time. That, along with Deans job, made it tricky to get their days off to match up.

"That's great!" Cas replied. "Annabeth, right?" He tilted his head as he confirmed the name of the newborn. His square features looked interested and excited.

"Yep, that's the one." Dean nodded. "Anyway, D'you want to go on a walk? We haven't been out as much as we should."

"Need to put a coat on. It's only January, you know." Castiel chuckled, coughing. He wiped his mouth before he could reveal the small spattering of blood on his hand. He smiled gingerly, stepping closer to Dean to lead him out into the tiny living room.

"Hm..." Dean frowned at the cough, his protective instincts coming to the forefront of his being. "I'll get your coat. I'll be fine without one."

"You said that last time." Cas reminded him. Dean waved his hand airily to dismiss the motherly comment. Growing up with just his dad had been tough on him and he didn't appreciate anyone trying to fill the gap.

"Come on, otherwise there'll be all sorts of joggers and stuff up on the hill." Dean called from the door. As Cas crossed the room to meet him, he took Deans hand and allowed the energetic man to drag him out of the door. He adjusted his backpack, which carried the bare minimum of water, and some chocolate for the climb up the hill.

The cold air hit them like a fist as they trotted across the apartment blocks carpark. The Impala, Deans pride and joy, had a screen of frost hiding it's from window. Dean cleared it away quickly and stuck the heating on, it's familiar rattle sounding through the chassis. Cas clambered into the passenger seat, knowing full well that he would never be allowed to drive the 'Baby' as Dean affectionately called the vehicle. Dean slid smoothly into the drivers seat and they roared out of the car park with gusto.

The drive was quick, with Dean singing along to the radio if he even partially knew the words to the song. Cas tried to sing along but fell into silence to listen to his boyfriends voice. He stared out the window with a smile on his face. Walks usually lasted all day and ended with wine in front of the telly"Dean?"

"Yeah, baby?" Dean said attentively, turning his head to look at Cas.

"Eyes on the road, mister." Cas commented, and Dean had to look back once more before complying. "I was just wondering... What's Sam like?"

"What's he like? Dean chuckled mid-sentence. "You certainly wouldn't lose him in crowd. He's tall, really tall. Six four or something ridiculous. Refuses to cut his hair. Brown hair and light brown eyes." Dean described his brother, glancing at Cas every few seconds to make sure he was still listening.

"And what's Jess like?" Cas asked, shifting in his seat to lean against the door and face Dean. He rested his head back on the window to listen.

"Jess? Oh, Jess is absolutely gorgeous. If I didn't have you, I'd be dead jealous. Long, wavy blonde hair and blue eyes. Annabeth'll be a looker when she's all grown up." Dean commented, smiling. His green eyes were now fixed on the road as he turned into the track up to the hill.

The pine-covered hill was cold, with dark brown needles carpeting the floor. The birds were just waking up from their nightly sleep and could be seen flitting about between the tangled branches. The actual forest floor was clear; the needles smothered the ground so nothing grew. A light early-morning mist still hung in the air, swirling between the trees.

Cas hummed a song as they walked, occasionally skipping ahead to check out a fallen log or stump. Dean was contented to walk at a steady pace. Years of hunting deer with his father had given him a lot of experience with forests. He enjoyed watching his boyfriend run ahead, enthusiasm flooding off him in waves. "Be careful!" He called forwards, his voice echoing in the silent trees. Cas waved his hand back in response.

"I will be!" Cas rubbed his icy nose, glad for the coat in the cold wood. He smiled, spinning in a small circle to take in the view. The sky above them hardly had a cloud in it, but it was freezing. The dark spines of the pine trees speared the azure.

Dean rubbed his arms, regretting his earlier dismissal of an overcoat. The t-shirt didn't do much in the way of insulation. The hairs on his strong forearms stood on end. "Wait up!" Dean called out to his boyfriend, holding up his old camera to take a few snaps of Cas as as he reached the top of a rise in the small track. Cas reaching the rise. Cas turning back to smile. Cas mid-sentence, saying 'I love you.'

Dean broke into a jog to catch up to the puppy-like man. He threw his arm around him, trying to catch a little warmth. "I told you so." Cas took Deans hands between his and vigorously rubbed them, warming them up. He put Deans hand in his warm coat pocket, smiling at him.

The walk continued at a brisk pace, Castiel enthusiastically dragging Dean along the track. Deans spirits soon lifted and he gave in, breaking into a run. Castiel was out of breath, maybe due to the running, but he still jogged. They slowly lapsed back into a walk, Deans arm resting on Castiels shoulder, with one hand in his pocket.

They emerged from the trees, the sudden sunlight warming their faces slightly. There was a little drop of maybe two feet onto their favourite spot: A large stone ledge that overlooked the hill and beyond that, the road. Dean hopped down first, easily landing with a slight thump. He held out his hand, which Castiel took. He helped the smaller man down.

Cas sat down abruptly, sniffing. "I'll miss this place." He said, looking back at Dean as he sat next to him.

"What d'you mean?" Dean looked at him, brow furrowing into a frown.

"I mean, I've done research on this type of cancer, and the fact is that I won't be strong enough to do much for a while. I won't be able to do a lot of things we like to do for a long time." Cas gestured to the view. "I won't be able to walk all the way up here. I won't be able to go cycling, or hunting, or swimming." He shook his head sadly.

"Oh..." Dean felt bad that he hadn't brushed up on cancer. He should've been able to see this coming but he hadn't. "We can find new hobbies. Like stamp collecting or something." He smiled.

"I'd like that..." Castiel nudged Deans arm. "Beer?" He cracked open his bag to reveal a six pack and some crisps. That made Dean smile.

"Go on then." Dean cracked open the beer and took a long sip, squinting at the setting sun. He leaned his head down on Castiels shoulder, and put one arm around him.

At some point, they stumbled down the hill, sufficiently drunk enough to sleep in the backseat of the car with Castiels long coat over them to keep them warm. For the first time in two days, Cas smiled and it wasn't sad.


	4. Sam and Jess

**Chapter Four**

 

"Shit, shit, shit, shit..." Dean chanted the words like they would soothe him, or speed up the drive. Sam and Jess arrived today, and he wasn't going to be there to meet him. Cas was still asleep in the back, messy hair tangled like a briar bush. He had his arm thrown carelessly across his face, covering his eyes as he slept on. The winding road slowed them down greatly, and the black car bounced slightly on the dirt.

They sped up as they hit the main road. They'd be locked out, the poor trio. Sam might have broken in if he had been on his own, but with his wife and baby daughter in tow, he probably couldn't. They would be waiting outside, cold and hungry, and tired out from the drive. Dean unhelpfully let his worries run wild as he drove. Dean braked hard as they reached the carpark, and climbed out of the black car just in time to see Sams car pull in behind him.

"What's going on?" Cas said tiredly from the back seat, hauling himself up into a sitting position with the aid of the door. He rubbed his bright blue eyes with a fist, blinking owlishly as he struggled to wake up quickly.

"Sam and Jess just got here." Dean smiled and helped Cas out of the car. The morning air was cold on Castiels face as he leaned against the car, smiling wryly as he adjusted his crumpled shirt. The hair on his arms rose up and he held his arms close to his chest to warm them back up again.

Jess was just as beautiful as Cas had imagined from Deans description. Long, wavy blonde hair now tied up in a long ponytail, and bright blue eyes. Her face lit up as she spotted the pair, but she didn't run to meet them as she was carrying a baby on her hip. The baby was dressed in a pale pink and white baby-gro, but was swaddled in a thick blanket to combat the cold wind. The tiny creatures blue eyes were scrunched up tight, with a thick lock of brown hair hanging down from her forehead.

"Dean! Castiel! Nice to see you two." Sam grinned as he crossed the car park to embrace his brother in a fierce bear hug. He seemed happy and healthy, with his long hair brushing his shoulders now. The look seemed to suit him though. Dean hugged him back, clapping his hand on his brothers broad spine, only releasing him to greet Jess and Annabeth.

"Yeah, yeah, good to see you." Cas shook Sams hand firmly, fully awake now. Sam turned to see Dean carefully lifting the nine month old baby out of Jess' arms, cradling her close to his chest. He began to do that strange holding-the-baby dance that everybody seemed to do, swaying gently and spinning. He looked so happy, with the baby staring up at him with a wide grin on her face. She squeaked, trying to untangle her chubby arm from the blanket to wave it at Dean.

Jess laughed, her voice like a bell. "Shall we go inside?" Jess prompted, putting her arm around her husband. Sam nodded, keeping an eye on Dean.

Dean blinked. "Yeah, sure, we just got back." Cas said, still slightly sleepy.

They settled around the small coffee table, Sam and Jess locking hands together as they listened to Dean. He obviously hadn't told them the whole truth about how ill Castiel actually was. 

"So… Lung cancer?" Jess said quietly, bouncing Annabeth on her knee absent-mindedly. She tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"Yep…" Dean replied, his arm touching Cas' elbow for comfort. "It's rare in somebody of his age but here it is." 

Castiel shrugged, now wearing a thick jumper even in the warmth of the apartment. "They -The doctors, that is- tell me that its too late for radiotherapy, too far gone for surgery, so the only option is Chemo." He leaned forwards and rested his chin on his hands, watching the steam billow out of the mugs of tea and coffee on the table. 

Jess put Annabeth to one side, resting the baby down on a mound of pillows as she reached across the table to take Castiels hand. "You'll be fine, alright?" She said, with her eyes softly gazing into Castiels. 

"I know I will be. Actually, we're leaving for a road trip in a few days up along the coast. Weather should be nice." Cas responded, standing up. "Anyway, I should be doing something… Dinner, or something. I don't know." He cleared his throat raspingly, and left the room. He sighed, eyes cast downwards as he stood in the kitchen, rummaging through the cupboards with shaky hands. He didn't like talking about stuff like this. He just wanted to be alone with Dean for five freaking minutes, was that too much to ask? 

"Baby, whats up?" Dean spoke quietly just behind Cas as he put his arms on Castiels shoulders. "You're not usually like this, are you…" He murmured. He didn't want Jess or Sam to hear their conversation. Helpfully, Annabeth began to squall in the other room, a loud noise that allowed them to talk in relative privacy in the small kitchen. 

"I don't like the way they look at me, ok?" Cas turned around, holding a jar of chickpeas for the soup close to his chest. He leaned back against the kitchen counter, shoulders hunched in a defensive manner. "They look so… Pityingly at me. Like them caring and moping will make a difference." The normally sweet and kind young man seemed irritated.

"You can't stop them from doing that, Cas." Dean said, his eyes casting their gaze over Cas' face in a short movement, judging his emotions. 

"I know, but it pisses me off. Can we leave early or something? Tomorrow morning?" Cas seemed desperate now, beginning to breath faster in short huffs. 

Dean ran his hand through his hair, stepping backwards to mull it over. Annabeths crying became louder now, echoing through into the kitchen. As much as Dean loved his niece, the sound of a baby crying would always make him want to punch a hole in a wall. "Fine… But we leave a note and like, fifty dollars for them as an apology." He wrinkled his nose and grabbed a beer out of the small fridge. 

Cas rolled his eyes. "Of course… By the way," He smiled. "Your sister-in-law is stunning." He couldn't help but make the comment, if just to break the tension in the air.

Deans shoulders relaxed, and he chuckled as he took a swig from the green bottle. He put the bottle back on the side with a clink of glass and smiled. "Don't say that in front of Sam. He gets protective of her like that." He clicked his fingers to emphasise the point. 

"He wouldn't punch a sick guy, right?" Cas tried to make light of his illness with the joke, and smiled again as he stepped forwards to close the gap between them. He pecked Dean on the lips quickly, stealing the kiss swiftly to avoid any awkward moments if Sam or Jess walked in on them.

"Nah, I guess not." Dean said after a little pause. "Shall we?" He took Castiels warm hand and squeezed it reassuringly as they left the kitchen.


	5. The Roadtrip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the end.   
> Dean and Castiel decide to take time away to go on a road trip before the Chemotherapy sessions start.

The Roadtrip

 

They woke up early, with Castiel's head nestled into the crook of Deans neck. Dean blew out of his nose instinctively to clear away the dark hair that curled out of the mans head in rivulets. Soon it would all be gone. Dean shook the thought from his head and blinked. He extracted his arm out from under Castiels body and pulled off the thick, warm blanket that they shared.

"C'mon honey." Dean murmured, crawling out of bed. He smiled, revealing his sharp canines in anticipation. "Roadtrip starts today." At that, Castiel opened his eyes and and sat up, stretching his arms out wide. He was so excited to be going outside. January had been replaced by February. The second month of the new year was the warmest in fifty years, and Dean was so glad because otherwise they would be stuck in the car for the whole trip. Cas was having trouble keeping warm. Nothing to do with the cancer, but he had never been the warmest of men.

"What time is it?" He asked, eyes scrunched up as Dean threw open the curtains. He blinked, watching Dean get dressed. Deans strong arms threw open the crappy apartment window, allowing some cold air in. He breathed in deeply, but snorted with laughter as he heard Castiel grunt in protest, then wriggle back down into the blanket, retreating into the warmth for just five more minutes.

"Never you mind. Too early." Dean turned his head to answer. "How're you feeling?" He asked, pulling on a shirt as he peered out of the window. Passers-by in the street below were bundled up in long coats, and scarves. "Dress warm for the drive, ok?" He reminded Cas, who lifted a hand behind his back in response.

"I'm fine... Just a bit tired. I might have a nap in the Impala on the road." Cas reported back, pulling on a jumper over his thick t-shirt. He was fatigued a lot of the time now, just because of the strain his lungs were under. Since being diagnosed, Dean had begun to pay closer attention to his boyfriend, who seemed to be quietly getting on with it. Such a little trooper. "What sort of food do you think there'll be? Lots of takeout? Are we going swimming?" Now that he was awake, Cas was full of excitement and questions that made Dean smile.

"Don't stress yourself. This'll be fun." Dean yawned, beginning to fix his hair in the mirror. He spiked it up into a soft quiff and grinned at his reflection. Castiel stood close behind him, resting his sharp chin on Deans shoulder. He scrutinised their reflection in the mirror, judging them to look presentable. He was a very neat fellow.

"First holiday in two years." Castiel replied, poking him in the ribs. He grinned mischievously, turning away from Dean for a moment to pull his shoes on. "I've almost forgotten what a holiday feels like."

"I've been busy, what're you gonna do about it?" Dean retorted, tickling the back of Castiels neck. Castiel shrunk back and squished his head down into his collar to protect himself, wrinkling his nose.

"Shh!" Cas suddenly said, glancing at the door. "Jess and Sam are sleeping, remember?" He grabbed a notepad from the drawer and began to write the note in his small, precise handwriting. Dean loved to read his handwriting.

'To Jess and Sam (And Annabeth too!)  
We've decided to maximise our time together and hit the road a few days early. We're going to head out early this morning so we can miss some of the traffic. I hope you three enjoy your little holiday down here without us! The spare keys to the apartment are under the rug in the living room so you can lock up when you leave.  
See you!  
Dean and Cas'

Castiel cracked open the door to their bedroom, and together they grabbed a few bottles of water from the fridge. Cas dropped the note onto the kitchen bench and they left the building. The stairs down to the parking lot were slippery with rain that had fallen in the night, so Cas held onto Deans sleeve as they descended. The air was cold and there was a light mist on the road as they sped out of the lot. Cas swivelled in his seat so he could watch the apartment block vanish from sight. "So… The highway it is." He said decisively, leaning sideways to kiss Deans nose.

Dean wrinkled his nose and took one hand off the wheel to waft Cas back into his seat as he turned on to the long, straight road that would lead them off to their Roadtrip. "You feeling ok now?" He asked, putting one hand on Castiels knee. The long, black Impalas engine roared as Dean hit the gas. The scenery zipped past them and Cas lowered the window for a second, pushing his head outside. He grinned as the wind whipped his hair up around his head like a halo. "Alright, alright, loreal ad, so you feel fine?" Dean couldn't help but smile. He switched on the radio to his favourite station, and began to tap on the steering wheel to the beat.

Cas adored to stick his head out the window of moving vehicles. He always told Dean that it was because it reminded him of flying. And whatever made Cas happy, made Dean doubly as happy. "Phew!" Cas said as he flopped back down onto his seat. "You really don't know how to drive slowly, do you?" He said in a motherly voice.

"Shut it, sweetie. I'll drive as fast as I like." Dean said stubbornly, speeding up just to spite the dark haired boy.

"Fine." Castiel said, rolling back in his seat to have a rest.

That night they parked up in an dark field in the middle of nowhere. The Impala rested on a small hill by the fence, and the two men sat up on the bonnet with Dean drinking beer, and Castiel drinking water. Doctors orders. The stars were bright, and lit their faces as they relaxed and stared upwards in comfortable silence. Dean had done the exact same thing with Sam when they had been teenagers. Borrowing their fathers car and driving out into some field to drink beer had been one of their favourite pastimes. That was before Sam met Jess, went to law school, and settled down.

Dean had been alone for a long time after that, wandering about for a while before eventually settling down as a car mechanic, using his skills to make a living. He had met Castiel when he had gotten a flat tire just outside. Dean, ever the hero, had offered to help. After that, Cas must have spent his entire free time in the garage with him before eventually working up the courage to awkwardly ask him out on a date.

And they say the rest is history.


End file.
